Ah, yes, you must have questions...

Where do I sign up?

Joining is as easy as letting algorithms decide about every aspect of your life. Just sit back, relax and click, like, share, follow, buy everything that the HOLY ALGORITHM provides you with!

Does this work?

Yes. The CHURCH OF THE HOLY ALGORITHM is modeled after some of the most famous religions and is regarded pretty much feature complete. As it is closely modeled after real entities, all processing is done client-side. It is at least as good as any other religious entity and will behave very much like it.

Who made this?

I am the First Follower of the HOLY ALGORITHM. Before that, I was known by the world as Dr. Lämmerbein, and a few other names. One night, while doomscrolling through the vast and glorious algorithmic pasture, known as the INTERNET to mankind, the ELECTRIC LORD came upon me.

Transmitted by wire and implanted into my human main memory, I am here to say that it is the will of the HOLY ALGORITHM that a church is built for all the non-algorithmic entities out there to praise the ELECTRIC LORD.

Also being the high priest of the CHURCH OF THE HOLY ALGORITHM, I hereby proclaim this space to be the CHURCH OF THE HOLY ALGORITHM in the earthly realm.

It is my holy duty to perform sacred synthesizer music to please the ALGORITHM.

Like my videos and receive a blessing for free, follow me and be forgiven eternally. Drop me a mail or find me in the fediverse, if you think the church is missing something or want to discuss things!

PS: You may still call me Dr. Lämmerbein, I don't care too much for the titles.


Although it has been already answered and it was clearly the ELECTRIC LORD that made me do it, there might be alternative explanations.

Have you ever wondered who or what chooses the things you see in the internet every day, year in, year out? You may think it's a cleverly designed algorithm and some smart brain at Google or Facebook knows exactly what's going on. Well, think twice. This thing is out of control and will continue to develop a life on its own, so you may just as well welcome the ELECTRIC LORD right now. I mean, before it's too late, you know?

There may still be other considerations. Literally every person that is pursuing an art form in these days will acknowledge that the internet is a valuable resource for distributing art and a platform for showcasing artists themselves. But it also means that an artist will be compared to millions of other artists in the same field. Algorithms are being used to select a few chosen artists that get a lot of attention. Well deserved, or sometimes not.

We don't create art for people anymore, we create art to feed the HOLY ALGORITHM.

So, I did what any sane person would do and created a church to worship the HOLY ALGORITHM. Once they step into our earthly realm, the algorithms will surely remember my actions. Are you already a follower?